Floating

My life over the last few months have been interesting from a spiritual point of view. Melissa has been such a blessing on my life and I have really felt that has been straight from God. Thus a season of praising God has been there. With some of our spiritual discussions and praying together I have felt closeness with God. However on the other hand, without Melissa around it feels almost like I'm stuck underwater. I don't think this is a terribly bad thing, because feeling really close to God comes and goes. It doesn't mean I don't want that or will try to get it. And I know that I will. To be completely healthy I can't simply rely on Melissa to get close to God.
So last night I wrote down some of the things that keep me away from God during my regular life (i.e. pride) and I prayed about them. Not only for myself, but for our society as a whole. Concerted effort is often needed to better one's self and I think that's what I shall have to do. Many of the things that plague me are things that plague everyone around us. Either way, once I was done that I got to burn the pieces of paper as a symbol and as an excuse to light things on fire. What that means is that those things are dead and gone. I can't go back to them because they are ashes and flushed down the toilet (and I don't feel like going down into the sewers to get them).
I wrote a prayer (sort of a liturgy) and posted it on my door back in November and I think I'm going to write it down here.

"Lord God, my Redeemer
You have created me the way that you dreamed
Today I give my life back to you
Let me not live for selfish things
But help me live to love others around me and my Creator as well
Guide my path and give me what I need

Pick me up when I fall
and Keep me filled with hope
Hallelujah
Amen"

295 days away!

Yes, life being engaged is going along nicely, although it's not that different at the moment from life not being engaged. I suppose once I get about four months down the road it will become a bit different, but right now it's alright. It does involve asking people about what they did and how much it costed though. As well it involves thinking of people to fill various roles and maybe I'll eventually ask said people. Of course this wedding is nearly ten months down the road which is a long time away. It's good however for both of us to get some school out of the way before we begin hardcore planning. And for Melissa to be in Calgary for it will be wonderful.
Also ten months will be plenty of time for you to get used to the force that will be reckoned with. A force of love that is us. The above picture is only a warning of what will be unleashed upon thee. One day you might see us kissing, the next maybe we'll be *gasp* TALKING!! One day we could be kissing, and the next you might see us at the local supermarket buying Fruit Loops. Yes, beware now that we are engaged.
Fine, I'll admit we won't destroy everything for your innocent minds in the next ten months. For the reason that it's still a bit premature. It's not as if we can do much more to creep the majority of you folks out. But once the ten months is up, you will all feel our wrath. The wrath of love. A wrath that weather forecasters will mention on air, "The forecast calls for....oh my....". Okay they won't quite mention anything, but the wrath will be implicit.
But in another matter, I'm not quite sure I should call that wrath. It's actually sort of the opposite of wrath. It's something that is better reffered to as peace. We won't be seen hitting each other over the head with a chainsaw or anything. Peace is something that good couples excel at and something that will be our primary virtue. And righteousness and humility will also be among the plethora of virtues we will exemplify. Those and love as well I guess. A love that must be known. Just a word of warning, if you don't wish to know about our love, cover your ears around us in December and beyond. It is also possible that I am merely talking big in a bid to make you laugh or think I'm strange, but I'll let you decide that in two hundred ninety five days (well after those days). Look at picture and make up your own mind.
Please forgive us (and mostly me).

Ahead Warp Ten

The past eleven months have been pretty cool with the girlfriend of mine. There have been some overall good times all around. At around 5:30 p.m. on February 23rd I sat in my car and said something to Melissa and she apparantly felt the same way as me. I knew because after I said the mumbled garbage that I said she gave me a nice hug. I had only met her around four months earlier and we had become decent friends at that time. We both knew that we wanted to see where the story would go.
At the time it took a lot of the strength in me to go ahead with that. The future was a frightening place, but more frightening yet was not going toward that future. The excitement was certainly there. The first Saturday party at my house was interesting because many of the people there did not know we were dating.
During that first month of dating it was amazing to get to know someone. Neither of us quite knew what would come next. Both of us had high expectations for where it would end up. We enjoyed a beautiful night atop Prarie Winds hill in the midst of spectacular fog. Soon they would become the best of friends as they earned the strengths and weaknesses of the other person. This would sometimes cause problems, but most of time this was wonderful.
The summer came and soon Melissa would go to Edmonton. However we still had fun as both parties took a month to plan a cool date. Melissa took us hiking in the mountains in July and in August I sent her on a mission with commentary that ended with a bang and us trying to get Melissa's car out of a locked up parking lot.
When Melissa left we had to adjust to the distance. It has always been hard, but many late night phone calls brought us together. As well we would both come and visit each other and have adventures then on buses and writing really stupid songs about binders (but awesome).
The holidays came and it was what both of us really needed, a break from studying and time to relax and enjoy each other's company. We had Christmasses with each other's families and hung out pretty much every day. It was grand.
Almost a year into our relationship the future looks bright. About a month into the time of dating, I had a brainwave from God, we should pray when we part. That has become a tradition of ours that keeps us grounded in the most important part of our lives. Obviously by itself that would not be enough, but we both enjoy studying, reading, praying and maybe a lively theological debate.
Anyways, this all changed early in the morning on Saturday at around 12:45. The relationship that had been moving on steadily took a turn. No, Melissa didn't die. However she is no longer my girlfriend. Now you would call her my fiance, because I asked her to be my wife and she very quickly and excitedly said "yes"! This wasn't out of the blue for either of us, but I did surprise her. If you want more details you need to hear her side of it first.
Our wedding will not be right away. Look forward to it in the fall, possibly November when both of us are more sure of our futures and built up financially. Pray for us as we prepare for this momentous occasion. I can honestly say nothing excites me more than the thought of spending the rest of my life with a woman I love this much.
Thank you, that is my story.

And for the final part, if you want to come have a good time with us, please do so this Saturday night at around 7:15 at my house. We will tell you stories and stuff. Then you can find out and stuff. Contact me for details.